So I cut my hair...

I seem to have a tendancy toward cutting my hair in times of depression. It's like some desperate act to not have to see myself the same way as I did yesterday, in a hope of no longer feeling like myself, like the way I did yesterday... I had thought of it for a while now, since the weather turned warm, but had liked the longer (like shoulder length) my hair had gotten to... so I held off on it... then wonderland guy seemed to like it when it was down and not tied back in a ponytail, so I hesitated some more... and then I recalled a few years back (like the last time I was growing out a black hair dye job) when I let my hair grow really long, like half way down my back and thought it might be cool to grow it out again... but then I felt down, and I'm kind of doubting I'll even see wonderland again... and it's warm out, and, well, I bought a new box of hair dye (burgandy again) and well, it's just easier to dye when it's shorter...

plus, I wasn't really thinking when I cut it... I was playing Sims, and after 'changing looks' on one of my sims I got up, pulled out the sissors and started cutting... probably should have done it earlier today, or tomorrow, as I'd just showered like 5 hours earlier, and didn't feel like taking another one just to get the cut hairs off me, so I just turned on the hair dryer to cool and hopefully blew most of them off.

maybe it'll help me get away from this state of mind... or maybe I already think I still look just as bad as before... and, well... guys seem to like long hair, so, guess I won't be attracting any new guys to me... not that I would have before anyway, so it's not like that'll probably be of any consequence...

I can't seem to watch anything but Friends right now... it's the only thing that doesn't depress me further for one reason or another...

I'm kind of afraid my friends are sick of me now... that I'm just a big downer... I think everyone is avoiding me, but I guess who can blame them... I'm kind of a big permanent loser... in every way...