Looking Back

Okay, feeling all strange now. Just sat and read through every online journal entry I've ever made, going back before this Blog. I used to keep a web site where I'd post journal entries. And it's always a little weird reading back over things you wrote, two, three, four years ago. Also strange was getting a little teary at a few of the entries. The ones where I distinctly recall crying while I was writing them, or nearly. I'm now trying to figure out if it was simply because the entries are just that sad, and emotionally rought, or if it's because looking back at entries, some made as far back as 2001 & 2002, that in some very big ways, I'm really still stuck in the same spot. Yeah sure, I've finally found a major I like and should graduate from this May. But aside from the schooling, and the fact that at that time I was still employed in a Photo lab, and was attending and just finishing at the Junior college. Other then the school path being more steady and focused, my life hasn't changed that much. I still have some good days, but also still hit some days where I'm ready to just sink into a hole, and for some of the same reasons, or lacking reasons as before. I hate feeling shitty for no reason, totally sucks. I'm not really feeling shitty right now... but not feeling as good as I was earlier. Yeah I think I depressed myself. *Good work there Meg.* *rolls eyes*.... Anyway...

That all said, already forseeing stressouts and manicness later in the semester... here's to hoping I get through it... with at least a shread of sanity left.