So, I forced one thing out of my mind, by using another thing to fill it's space. Now that thing I used to replace needs to get out of my head... so I'm hoping that during Spring Break, and maybe some trips to the movies alone will kind of force me back into my aloneness and into that imaginary world that is all that I have to really thrive on. Course it may have been what lead me to this place to begin with... but I've been content here, at least once in a while, so I'll have to try to be again. To try and learn, for real, to live in solitary. No one else can every truly be counted on... Think I may have just thought of what my next LJ entry will come from... The sad thing is, that I've said these words many times before, yet somehow they won't stick. I've had this conversation with myself before... as far back as high school, I've tried to make that notion stick.
It usually works for a little while, but then I either become desperate for socializing again, or I become so horribly mistrustful of everyone else that I just sink down into myself... and then there are the times when both happen at once, and that's never a good place... I just don't know what to do now... I really should go back to that entry I made some months ago... Just Shut Up!... it really is the best idea... just shut up... no one wants to hear it, no one needs to hear it... I just need to get over this shit... and accept my fucked up little pathetic excuse for a life the way it is...
JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET THE FUCK OVER IT... STUPID GIRL!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment